Nerd Dating Application
Thank you for your interest in dating me. Due to the high volume of interested applicants, I will not be able to reply to all. Allow four to six weeks for processing. A $10 processing fee may be imposed for incomplete or illegible applications.
Applicant’s Full Name______________________
Applicant’s Nickname(s) _____________________________
Applicant’s Gaming Name(s)_____________________________
Age _____
IQ _____
Degree(s) you have _____________________________
Occupation _____________________________
Girl Scout/Boy Scout Rank ___________________
What band instrument you play/played___________________
Has a restraining order ever been filed against you?
Do you currently have a driver’s license?
Do you floss your teeth?
How often do you harass guys on WOW?
What was the last book you read and how long ago did you read it?
Circle one of the following
Slytherin Gryffindor Hufflepuff Ravenclaw
How often do you shave yourself?
Can you cook?
Can you fix a computer?
How many computers do you own?
What have you been for Halloween the past three years?
Which comic series do you read and who is your favorite superhero?
What television shows do you own on dvd?
Do you take your action figures out of the box?
Which side of the bed do you prefer to sleep on?
How many “psycho” ex-girlfriends do you have?
How many exes are you still hooking up with?
When was the last time you had sexual intercourse? ___ a few hours ago ____a few days ago ____a few months ago ____a few years ago
Please specify all fetishes.
Please Circle one of the following
Shaman Rogue Warlock
Check applicable sleep conditions: ___ sleep apnea ___bed wetting ___ sleep-walking ___sleep-talking ___random thrashing ____cover hogging
Do you have children?
Do you like children?
Do you have a good relationship with your mother?
Is she prone to mood swings or currently taking anti-depressants?
Does she like sweet, charming, smart guys?
Please finish the following quotes:
“Hello, My name is Inigo Montoya…”
“Your mother was a hamster…”
“Your lack of faith…”
“Where we are going…”
“Goonies never say…”
“Let’s do the…”
Do you wear perfume? Please spray this form with the kind you are likely to wear on a date.
What is your preferred mode of communication? ___ text ___phone ___email ___IM ___Post-It note ____social networking site ___ Tumblr ask box.
Describe your perfect first date.
Please attach one baby picture, three references, and a copy of your library card and current immunization records.
I ATTEST THAT THESE ANSWERS ARE TRUE AND CORRECT TO THE BEST OF MY KNOWLEDGE UNDER PENALTY OF PERJURY.
X _______________________________________
No comments:
Post a Comment