April Marie's Random Ramblings

I really don't feel right with what happened last week. It really doesn't feel right. There are too many things the biggest one being that it is so out of character for him that it really feels wrong. I don't know what to do. I still love him with all of my heart, mind, body, soul, etc... K is apparently now accusing me of saying things at work that should never get out at work and somehow some of the boys know. I wonder if he is the one doing it. Ever since what happened happened, he has been distancing himself more and more. I know I haven't said shit to anyone at work about it. Too much at stake if I did. It hurts when you know you haven't lied to someone and then they accuse you of it and are convinced that you are. Megs grandpa is in the hospital again and this time might be the final time. He was asking for a preacher earlier. She is down in Mission Viejo now. It really sucks. I have been going on a slight cleaning spree and don't expect to see her again until Monday at the earliest. Which means she is probably not coming with us to Halloween Haunt tomorrow night. Which sucks but oh well.At the moment I have the last load of laundry washing right now. I folded all her clothes and did both our bedsheets. Since we sleep in the same room. All I have left is my clothes and I'll do those on Sunday when I am home again in between church and Sunday Swing Jam. Will also be doing a lot more cleaning too. Sigh. Too many things going on for me to really sleep or anything. I don't like this. Her birthday is in a week. and Halloween two days after. Still don't know what I'm doing. Thinking I might go get drunk. Not sure yet. Oi. I wish life could be simpler sometimes. Also, no I don't feel like elaborating on any of the above. Those who know, know and those who don't, don't. Even if you do know. I still don't want to talk about it. I just needed to get it out. My diary is the only thing that knows fully 100% and that is in hiding.